How To Win Friends and Dominate A Virus

Cast Iron Brains is back (as regularly scheduled) to discuss Trump’s brief run-in with the novel coronavirus, and we approach the conversation with precisely as much seriousness and solemnity as is due a subject as sobering as the health of our insane clown president. That and plenty more—listen!

The latest edition of the Cast Iron Brains Official Election Forecast Model is here.

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Here’s the TRUMP RETURNS FROM HAVING PERSONALLY VANQUISHED COVID-19 HYPE VIDEO with the killer soundtrack.

And the associated POP QUIZ:

From which of the following albums is the music from Donald Trump's exciting return from Walter Reed to the White House via Marine One:

A. Soundtrack of popular Christian movie GOD'S NOT DEAD

B. EPIC MALE SONGS

C. Soundtrack of X-Box game GEARS OF WAR

D. SEDUCE AND DESTROY, an audiobook by men’s rights activist and “pickup-artist” Frank TJ Mackey

The answer was, of course, EPIC MALE SONGS, available to purchase from Amazon, here, if you’re an actual crazy person. Here’s the tune, with the vocals in this time:

And Trump’s post-return video explaining how the American people must not fear the virus, but instead DOMINATE it. You know, the way you would a misbehaving dog.

I called him a low-rent Robert DeNiro in the show, because I couldn’t get the other thing he sounds like off the tip of my tongue, which is a poor-man’s Christopher Walken, which he also sounds like in that clip.

Chris Wallace and Total Shithead Steve Cortes, on Fox News Sunday last weekend—excerpted portion starts at 2:10 or so:

Here’s one of my favorite essays (of mine) that I referenced in this episode: It’s Always Been Thus.

Trump hasn’t taught America anything, because every lesson he has to offer would require a societal self-recrimination so complete as to lay bare the bankruptcy of the whole rotten enterprise. America taught Trump everything he needed to know, everything we need to know. Trump isn’t some puppeteer manipulating our minds, he simply recognized that there was a giant market for his brand of lowest common denominator horseshit, and he sought to profit from that market--and so he has. He fills a need. "It's always been thus," indeed.

Matt Gaetz, a true weirdo, is quite impressed by his president:

Finally, the article we discussed at the end of the episode about so-called wokese : The Language of Privilege. Worth a read!

Don’t forget, there’s an episode from the Content Maw coming soon, in which we’ll discuss PKD’s novel UBIK, and shortly thereafter will follow yet another episode from the Content Maw in which we’ll talk about HBO’s adaptation of the Philip Roth novel The Plot Against America. We only do Philip-stuff from the Content Maw these days, apparently.

Talk to you soon!

"You know, Italians--that's just how they are."

Great Debate, or Greatest Debate?